I get the same feeling from a lot of the other things written about rape. That they just leave me feeling worse, hollow, cracked open.
And I realized that most of the things I read about rape were how you described. Gingerly picking up the "broken glass" of the people they speak of.
And that doesn't help me. It makes me feel weak, powerless, shattered. I don't want to be any of those things. And I'm not any of those things. I am strong. I've gone through a lot of shit and came out bent but not broken. I do have power. I can control many things in my life and I comprehend the things I can't control so I can avoid them hurting me. I'm am whole. I'm not broken or shattered. Only wounded, hurt.
But that hurt is bandaged, the ointments and antibiotic salves are on it and the wound is healing. Reading those things made me feel like the wound was open again. Sprinkled some salt in it.
But writing this gave me power. It was from a position of strength. The strength of someone who recognizes that she was made a victim but also recognizes that she can and will heal and she can and will take back control in her life.
I'm glad there's other people out there that needed what I needed and I'm glad I could provide that. Thank you for the view into a healed future.
Re: triggering
I get the same feeling from a lot of the other things written about rape. That they just leave me feeling worse, hollow, cracked open.
And I realized that most of the things I read about rape were how you described. Gingerly picking up the "broken glass" of the people they speak of.
And that doesn't help me. It makes me feel weak, powerless, shattered. I don't want to be any of those things. And I'm not any of those things. I am strong. I've gone through a lot of shit and came out bent but not broken. I do have power. I can control many things in my life and I comprehend the things I can't control so I can avoid them hurting me. I'm am whole. I'm not broken or shattered. Only wounded, hurt.
But that hurt is bandaged, the ointments and antibiotic salves are on it and the wound is healing. Reading those things made me feel like the wound was open again. Sprinkled some salt in it.
But writing this gave me power. It was from a position of strength. The strength of someone who recognizes that she was made a victim but also recognizes that she can and will heal and she can and will take back control in her life.
I'm glad there's other people out there that needed what I needed and I'm glad I could provide that. Thank you for the view into a healed future.